30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 24

When dealing with our adult kids, we also deal with their adult spouses….or ex-spouses. Everyone takes a corner in the ring, waits for the bell and it’s been 12 rounds ever since….with every one of them. I lamented in an earlier Prayer Challenge that our grandkids hardly ever see us…but how can they when everyone wants to go to court, sue, take custody, get money, etc. ALL THE TIME. These so-called adult kids are teaching our grandkids how to work the court system rather than play sports or go to camp.

Then, rather than just being a kid, they are taught hate and how to lie. They hear one side bad mouth the other side…on both sides. No child should have to know such information about their parents and family. I distinctly remember my grandmother saying bad things about my dad and I told him what she said. He flipped out, and rightly so. Now, let me explain one thing: She may have been right. But it was not her place to talk over me, at nine years old, to other adults about my ‘lousy’ dad.

We put way too much on our kids when we speak of things that have nothing to do with them. We put the responsibility of knowing such things on tiny shoulders that grow up too fast. They try to understand, they ask questions, and before you know it they are acting out. They consider themselves adults rather than kids.

“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6

Even in Christian households we are training up our kids to be lousy adults by keeping them in the loop about things that are none of their business. Christians expect Sunday School to teach their kids about God rather than themselves. Christians aren’t teaching how to be Godly but how to circumvent the system God created.

We have to be the stewards that God made us so that the next generation will have a better chance at making better choices at life.

Pray for the children and their parents; the anger is so great that they don’t see who is in the line of fire. Pray for God’s guidance rather than hoping for the best.

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 23

Has the earth somehow flipped on its axis? Society has turned a 180 with the way we deal with our family. My husband and I were talking about our grandmothers and how we revered them…respected them because we should. I mean, why wouldn’t we? Isn’t that NORMAL? I certainly thought so. Our adult kids believed their grandmas walked on water! But here we are, our adult kids think we are of no real use and don’t bother teaching their children to respect their grandparents: US.

These kids make us feel like we have to do some real recon to see our grandkids or at least see a photo now and then. And since the advent of social media and smart phones, this should NOT be a problem or an inconvenience….but it is.

This ain’t rocket science, this is minute-to-minute real life that we are missing out on because some of our adult kids think their kids don’t need us. We know what the problem is, and what the one common denominator is: GOD.

THIS is what, or really WHO, offends some of our kids…GOD. I can’t emphasize enough how much Jesus has brought us through EVERYTHING! We give him Glory and Honor and Praise no matter what. This is the same God that gave them life and breath, the same God that loves them beyond measure, THE VERY SAME GOD that saved my life…and God is the problem? How can anyone reconcile that God is the problem when it is God that SAVES and HEALS?

v6 As you therefore have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in Him,
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7 rooted and built up in Him and established in the faith, as you have been taught, abounding in it with thanksgiving.
v8 Beware lest anyone cheat you through philosophy and empty deceit, according to the tradition of men, according to the basic principles of the world, and not according to Christ.
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9 For in Him dwells all the fullness of the Godhead bodily;
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10 and you are complete in Him, who is the head of all principality and power. [Colossians 2:6-10]

Being a Child of God in the world today is tough enough but when our own families and kids come against us, it’s HARD. But we cannot give up the Faith or we have NOTHING. What our kids don’t understand yet is that WITH God we are better parents and grandparents.

Pray that God will send a mentor, a spiritual ‘speedbump’ to our adult kids. Through prayer and fasting we can combat this and be better Christians for it. Remember, this is a TEST. And with every test comes a testimony.

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 22

If you don’t know this about me, I also witness on the sidewalk of abortion facilities. Every day that place is open we see teenagers and young adults coming to abort their precious child. They usually don’t come alone; they are literally flanked with their own parents and sometimes grandparents to see that the child is aborted. As a parent, when I see parents giving their thumb’s up to kill their own grandchild, you really ‘get’ how these kids have gotten to where they are in life at such a young age.

Our adult kids and teenagers are children of this media age. They are coerced every day with constant media stimulation of one kind or another. Video games and online gaming has made real zombies of our kids. In the news recently, one dad smothered his infant son and another allowed his child to starve to death because of gaming. While these are extreme cases, they are just the tip of the iceberg. Our adult kids are still playing games and living in a fantasy world. My grandma always said television would ruin our eyes.

The basics of life are totally ignored. And we wonder why some of these kids can’t make it on their own and blame us for it? We teach them, they look at us like we’re some kind of monster. Because of this media age, they have all the answers, we’re idiots. We want to help them with a Godly hand, we’re told they hate God.

This is a sin problem; for them life is fantasy and selfish and never ending. A self professed ‘pastor’ said that his daughter can get an abortion because of free will. And that is true…but this ‘pastor’ and his daughter still have to answer to God for their flagrant use of His gift of free will. Again, this is a sin problem, not a chink in the armor.

 “I struck you with blight and mildew and hail in all the labors of your hands; yet you did not turn to Me,’ says the Lord.” Haggai 2:17

We will all eventually turn back to God. Being backslidden is a heavy bondage to carry.

Pray for the Damascus Road experience for these kids. Pray that the scales will fall from their eyes, “I was once blind but now I see”, [John 9:25].

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 21

I have a friend that has absolutely NO idea where her adult son is. Because she is a Christian, he walked out on their mother/son relationship both figuratively and literally. I understand where she’s at, mine have done the same. They say it’s because they don’t believe in Jesus but the truth is that they are convicted deep in their spirit for what they do and consequently blame us for being ‘holy rollers’ that pushed them out. That’s a real nice explanation, too bad it’s an outright lie. If ANYONE is a Christ follower, they purport the love of Christ, not shake their fist in His name.

Whether or not that actually happens is not the point; I know that is not the case here. When I came to the Lord, I wished EVERYONE Jesus! I STILL grieve thinking of the souls, especially my children, that may not make it because they live for the world. My heart and soul is sick, however my faith is unwavering.

As parents and Christians, we need to remember that the enemy places our own children against us and Jesus so that we would be forced to make a decision: Jesus or them. Just keep in mind that your children cannot get you into Heaven.

The prodigal son? That parable should have been called the prodigal father…but in my case, the prodigal mother. While the adult child goes and lives like he wants despite how he was raised with his fist raised to God, we wait. And sometimes a VERY LONG TIME.

v11 Then He said: “A certain man had two sons. v12 And the younger of them said to his father, ‘Father, give me the portion of goods that falls to me.’ So he divided to them his livelihood. v13 And not many days after, the younger son gathered all together, journeyed to a far country, and there wasted his possessions with prodigal living.” Luke 15:11-13

So many young adults run the system thinking they have everything in control. The truth is that the system has them; they spend what they don’t have in hopes to have it one day. And a lot of times they use their parent’s money to float their disobedience. As a parent with a bank account, I had to finally say no. I cannot fund a rotten lifestyle that does not glorify God.

v17 “But when he came to himself, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have bread enough and to spare, and I perish with hunger! v18 I will arise and go to my father, and will say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you’.” Luke 15:17-18

I don’t know that I need an apology, what I need is to forgive and look forward rather than looking at a past that we cannot change. All that I do ask is they be obedient to God and do what He says. I cannot imagine how they would react when they understand the economy of God and that He loves them. Sometimes provision comes in obedience.

“And he arose and came to his father. But when he was still a great way off, his father saw him and had compassion, and ran and fell on his neck and kissed him.” Luke 15:20

I think we forget to have compassion for our adult kids rather than staying mad at a situation we couldn’t change. Short of duct tape and zip ties, I cannot force our adult kids to do anything. When they are on ‘self destruct’ all we can do is show our compassion and love.

v23And bring the fatted calf here and kill it, and let us eat and be merry; v24 for this my son was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ And they began to be merry.” Luke 15:23-24

And it should be a celebration! Standing in the doorway looking like judge and jury is not the love of God. Don’t get me wrong – I am human – but as I get older I see how short time really is. Life is happening right now and death will eventually come. I just want them prepared to leave this earth and go to a place prepared for us, “v2 I go to prepare a place for you. v3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also”, [John 14:2-3].

My prayer today is all adult children understand that being parents did not end when they left. Nothing can shake the love of a parent or the love of God. Our children are always ours, and we are His.

I don’t know about you but I’m still waiting…and it’s okay. I do what Christ would do: Wait with a loving and forgiving heart.

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 20

First, Happy Resurrection Day! And if you woke up this morning, PRAISE GOD! If every day we took joy in just being able to open our eyes another day, imagine how much happier we would be!

Three of our adult kids are living with friends or a parent, they don’t have a home of their own. And they have children, too. Every day they do their best to do more, to have their own piece of earth, to make their own home with their kids. Everyone wants the ‘American Dream’ but I wish they wanted what Jesus Christ provided – an Eternal home rather than a dream. We celebrate the sacrifice Christ made for us. We don’t need a picket fence for that.

I know how my boys feel; they want to be real men that have their own homes. Jesus said, “Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay His head“, [Matthew 8:20]. JESUS HAD NOWHERE TO LAY HIS HEAD. Even His tomb was borrowed:

“v57 Now when evening had come, there came a rich man from Arimathea, named Joseph, who himself had also become a disciple of Jesus. v58 This man went to Pilate and asked for the body of Jesus. Then Pilate commanded the body to be given to him. v59 When Joseph had taken the body, he wrapped it in a clean linen cloth, v60 and laid it in his new tomb which he had hewn out of the rock; and he rolled a large stone against the door of the tomb, and departed.” Matthew 27:57-60

There is so much hopelessness in the world; everyone picking away at life. Christ died a horrible death for all of us, you would think that when they wake up every morning they would rejoice knowing the debt was paid! But they despair. All. The. Time.

Jesus said, It is finished!” And it is. Our debt is paid. All we have to do is believe.

Pray that our adult kids will appreciate what has been provided and that they will see the light of Salvation rather than darkness. And take time to thank God for the gift of Jesus!

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 19

In these last 19 posts, I have whined and opined how our boys have been our greatest challenge; they see through eyes that don’t see God in everything or anything, even the bad stuff. If we did not see and experience trouble and tribulation, how would we seek God?

I have been putting off one of our fervent prayer targets regarding our adult kids. She is THE epitome of a warrior of Jesus Christ. She really does bring sunshine on a cloudy day. Even her ‘bad days’ are never bad enough to not be that ray of sunshine WE may need. She’s faced adversity from all angles, she has been hurt and tread upon. But NEVER has she EVER hated God.

She knows that it’s sin that has brought her to where she’s at and it’s JESUS that will deliver her. She knows the devil can’t have her because she is a true child of God. She has real Joy in the Lord and PRAYS.

She is a great mom that has a great big mushy heart for her children but rules with a firm, Godly hand.

When she cries our whole world stops. When she is hurt, we hurt. But through it all, she has never stopped loving God no matter how hard her day, week, month or years has gotten.

She gives freely and with love, with her hard earned money or with her time. She wants everyone to know Jesus as their Savior.

And she has a chronic illness, one that can take her life.

NO EXCUSES: So, when our boys act like the overgrown insipid monkeys they are [I am being sooooo kind here :)], we remind ourselves of that ray of sunshine that lives way too far away for us to hold and calm in her times of trouble or when pain goes through her frail body like a cat 5 hurricane. We cannot say enough how much we are humbled that God gave us such a creature to behold and learn from.

v18 And Jesus came and spoke to them, saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. v19 Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, v20 teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Amen. [Matthew 28:18-20]

We are forever grateful to God for each of our children; each one has qualities I adore. Our prayer today is that they will understand deliverance and the true nature of who God is – our Friend, our Deliverer and our Father: “And the Scripture was fulfilled which says, ‘Abraham believed God, and it was accounted to him for righteousness.’ And he was called the friend of God“, [James 2:23].

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 18

One of our adult kids has gotten particularly hard at life, hard at the things of God. Good Friday…on that day Christ died for our sins; He is our propitiation, our gift. We did not deserve Him but God loved us so much that he gave His only Son. As parents we demonstrate our love for our kids with our sacrifices to give them what they need or want. Certainly I am not God, neither are you. But to our kids, we seem so.

For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die.” Romans 5:7

The loyalty we show for our children isn’t reciprocated or even appreciated. My middle son’s birthday was just the other day, he wouldn’t answer his phone. I gave birth to that beautiful redheaded ball of energy and he wouldn’t pick up the phone or call us back. I would give my life for him and he won’t answer his phone? To that I say, I gave birth to you and CHRIST DIED FOR YOU…what else could you possibly want? Your life began with me and it can end in Eternity with Christ; I’d say your needs are taken care of, if you accept Christ.

“But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8

Can you even imagine it? JESUS DIED FOR US! How can anyone not be awestruck by that? No one would, at the very least, stand up for me; but not only did Christ stand up for me, He died for me…ME. Dealing with unsaved or backslidden kids is heartbreaking for me, I cannot imagine how that grieves Him after enduring a horrific, humiliating death on a Cross for these kids to ignore.

As our kids get older we want to be what they want but as they grow into adults, we have to become what they need. Some of these kids are not satisfied with ‘need’, they want more and more, and on their terms. Then, rather than kicking against the goads, perhaps they should take the narrow gate?

v4 Then he fell to the ground, and heard a voice saying to him, “Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting Me?”

v5 And he said, “Who are You, Lord?” Then the Lord said, “I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting. It is hard for you to kick against the goads.”

v6 So he, trembling and astonished, said, “Lord, what do You want me to do?” Acts 9:4-6

In the spirit of thanksgiving, Paul asked what he could do for Him. Even after all of the persecution that Paul [then Saul] had committed to Christians, in that moment he knew he had grieved the Lord for what he did and asked “Lord, what do you want me to do”? Paul spent a lifetime doing what He called him to do. Paul was given a gift he cannot repay, a debt that we all owe.

I pray for my children to be comforted in their time of need and despair with the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ, not the empty promises of the world.

 

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 17

My adult kids and I may have had our troubles, but ultimately my goal as their mother is to get them to the altar…of repentance.

For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 6:23

I am awakened nearly every night by God to pray. I pray for my children to have Heaven as their Eternal home. It paralyzes me to think they may not make it. If it’s by the fruit we judge, then I’m concerned.

Parents are not perfect; most far from it. I teach from my failure so that they will not know the grief I know. Leading that horse to water is hard enough, but trying to get it to drink is quite another. Because of ‘free will’ we sin…WE sin, not just me. Adult kids LOVE to point out our sin but it’s just a ploy to take the focus off them. However, as parents we want them to have what we could not; we sacrifice but they see us as selfish. Knowing that I cannot change what they think or do, I PRAY.

Prayer is what we should have been doing the entire time. How many times have we said ‘All we can do is pray’? It’s like a last-ditch effort to do what we should have been doing from the start. I may be old and slow, but I’m still teachable.

“Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.” James 5:16

Pray for salvation, and if your kids are backslidden, pray like the devil is chasing you…because he is.

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 16

When we have these times of woe with our adult kids it’s so nice to be able to see with mom eyes once in a while. Today is my son’s birthday. Today I remember the day I was blessed with this precious redhead. He’s an adult now with a child of his own, and I’m glad to report that God gave him the same child he gave me, I say with tongue in cheek.

Our blessings are great and few, depending on how you look at it. I am forever my son’s mother, I am forever blessed.

I wish him Jesus. I want him to know an Eternity in Heaven:

“v9 That if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. v10 For with the heart one believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.” Romans 10:9-10

The prayer I pray everyday is for my son’s salvation and sanctification. I want them to know the Joy of the Lord. I wish them to be great men and great fathers and great Christians.

I am forever thankful to God that He chose me to be their mother.

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 15

How I wish my kids really knew the Joy of the Lord. They, like most people, believe it’s happiness that brings joy. While happiness is very short lived, joy is for every minute of every day. Joy is a lifestyle, if you are a born-again believer.

“Again, the kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and hid; and for joy over it he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field.” Matthew 13:44

I cannot imagine my life without the Lord. He is my field, my Joy.

But that always wasn’t so. I got saved at 40 years old, well after I had my children. I believe this is why my children have their worldly woes; they were raised by a worldly mom that knew no more than what the world taught…just like they are today.

Trying to undo the past is pretty much impossible. This is what I am trying to teach our adult kids, from our own attempts at trying to rule the world rather than obeying God. Our results were pretty bleak, just like theirs.

What I cannot understand is why our adult kids would rather do what we used to do and expect optimum results rather than seeing how we live for the Lord now. Certainly we do not have tons of possessions or a huge home, but that is by design and being obedient; learning financial stewardship was FREEING. Christians don’t have ‘need’ of things…we need Jesus Christ, our Joy.

My prayer [at 4am this morning!] is that our kids and your kids will understand and live by Jesus and His incredible ministry rather than chasing 30 pieces of silver. This is ‘Holy Week’, the last earthly week of the life of Jesus. He did so much for us and I wish our children the deep Joy we have in Him for them.

God Bless you all today ~ the new blanket of snow on the ground this morning is like a brand new blanket of renewal to me. Have a great day!