30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 16

When we have these times of woe with our adult kids it’s so nice to be able to see with mom eyes once in a while. Today is my son’s birthday. Today I remember the day I was blessed with this precious redhead. He’s an adult now with a child of his own, and I’m glad to report that God gave him the same child he gave me, I say with tongue in cheek.

Our blessings are great and few, depending on how you look at it. I am forever my son’s mother, I am forever blessed.

I wish him Jesus. I want him to know an Eternity in Heaven:

“v9 That if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. v10 For with the heart one believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.” Romans 10:9-10

The prayer I pray everyday is for my son’s salvation and sanctification. I want them to know the Joy of the Lord. I wish them to be great men and great fathers and great Christians.

I am forever thankful to God that He chose me to be their mother.

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 15

How I wish my kids really knew the Joy of the Lord. They, like most people, believe it’s happiness that brings joy. While happiness is very short lived, joy is for every minute of every day. Joy is a lifestyle, if you are a born-again believer.

“Again, the kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and hid; and for joy over it he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field.” Matthew 13:44

I cannot imagine my life without the Lord. He is my field, my Joy.

But that always wasn’t so. I got saved at 40 years old, well after I had my children. I believe this is why my children have their worldly woes; they were raised by a worldly mom that knew no more than what the world taught…just like they are today.

Trying to undo the past is pretty much impossible. This is what I am trying to teach our adult kids, from our own attempts at trying to rule the world rather than obeying God. Our results were pretty bleak, just like theirs.

What I cannot understand is why our adult kids would rather do what we used to do and expect optimum results rather than seeing how we live for the Lord now. Certainly we do not have tons of possessions or a huge home, but that is by design and being obedient; learning financial stewardship was FREEING. Christians don’t have ‘need’ of things…we need Jesus Christ, our Joy.

My prayer [at 4am this morning!] is that our kids and your kids will understand and live by Jesus and His incredible ministry rather than chasing 30 pieces of silver. This is ‘Holy Week’, the last earthly week of the life of Jesus. He did so much for us and I wish our children the deep Joy we have in Him for them.

God Bless you all today ~ the new blanket of snow on the ground this morning is like a brand new blanket of renewal to me. Have a great day!

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 14

Aren’t there days when our adult kids look and act just like Goliath? Goliath was proud, big, mean – he made fun of David: “…he [Goliath] disdained him; for he was only a youth, ruddy and good-looking.” 

Do you remember when your kids thought they were big enough to take you? You know, it’s kind of a rite of passage. They get all puffed up thinking that they are large and in charge. Well, not this mom. I won’t be defeated by Goliath.

“Then he took his staff in his hand; and he chose for himself five smooth stones from the brook, and put them in a shepherd’s bag, in a pouch which he had, and his sling was in his hand. And he drew near to the Philistine.” 1Samuel 17:40

The weapons our kids use are scare tactics, much like what Goliath used with David. Nothing is scarier than kids that have no fear. They expect us to deal with their loftiness. We are subjected to being practically ordered to pay for their adult life. Well, NOT IN MY HOUSE….anymore. I needed to remember who is in charge of this house: The Lord is first, my husband second, then little ol’ me…with FIVE STONES.

Then David said to the Philistine, “You come to me with a sword, with a spear, and with a javelin. But I come to you in the name of the Lord of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied.” 1Samuel 17:45 

When we were younger, we [my husband and I] did not have luxury of treating our parents badly to get things. Never did I consider stealing from them. They were like God to me. The Bible says that ‘children will rise up against parents and cause them to be put to death‘ but I never really believed it could really happen, but it does. 

Pray for all adult kids to be kinder and gentler to their parents. Mighty Goliath may have all the weapons of mass destruction, but I’ll hold onto those five smooth stones….but I’ve got a feeling everything’s gonna be alright.

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 13

As parents to adult kids, we still want to ‘parent’ them. I realized how bad I want to wrap my boys up and protect them from the enemy, even with my own life. I hate how the world treats them, I hate how the enemy uses them. But I see with spiritual eyes, they do not. They see ‘bad luck’ or ‘God hates me’ rather than circumstances that seem to pick and choose when to be reckoned with. It is the enemy who seeks them, it is God who wants to give them rest.

The tongue seems to have a mind of it’s own. One could rule the world if they could tame the tongue:

“v8 But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. v9 With it we bless our God and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the similitude of God. v10 Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be so.” James 3:8-10

The battlefield of the mind, the taming of the tongue needs to be dealt with every minute of every day. There is no other way to relearn how to live within polite society. Giving mercy gets mercy, giving grace gets grace. Mercy and grace are the greatest provision from God.

“v1 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. v2 And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” Romans 12:1-2 

Speaking with my oldest son yesterday about his current circumstances, I was met with a general kind of well-being from him. Rather than still being angry, he has accepted his lot and is working toward a better end rather than shadow boxing God.

There is Joy in the Lord, not a bunch of money and an easy life. I cannot state this emphatically enough: Jesus is the only answer to EVERY question, “Do not sorrow, for the joy of the Lord is your strength,” [Neh 8:10].

Pray that your adult kids will see their way is not working on the long term and will accept a Holy God rather than scraps from the world.

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 12

While reading the story of Noah, I noticed parallels with today’s Christian family – the patriarchal hierarchy in which the family assumes salvation through a parent or grandparent; or perhaps aunt or uncle. In my family it was my aunt. We figured she had all the religion stuff covered for us. How far from the truth is that! NO ONE can assume YOUR salvation for you! Our adult kids are riding that wave, the one we created as saved followers of Christ.

The Bible says, “Noah was a just man, perfect in his generations. Noah walked with God,” [Gen 6:9]. In that bit of scripture it did not say one word about Noah’s family having a personal relationship with the Lord. Then, did his family ride his salvation coattails? I’d say the evidence says yes:

“v20 And Noah began to be a farmer, and he planted a vineyard. v21 Then he drank of the wine and was drunk, and became uncovered in his tent. v22 And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brothers outside. v23 But Shem and Japheth took a garment, laid it on both their shoulders, and went backward and covered the nakedness of their father. Their faces were turned away, and they did not see their father’s nakedness.” Genesis 9:20-23

Remember, when this happened to Noah, the flood was over, “So God blessed Noah and his sons, and said to them: Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth,” [Gen 9:1] – which means that his entire family saw with their own eyes how God saved them from the flood that killed everything on earth. And even that was not enough to bring them to the end of themselves and to the Lord.

Do our adult kids assume salvation through us? I know I did as a young adult, I really thought that I didn’t have to do anything. I pray and pray and pray that my kids will find the Lord, I pray for their protection; these things we SHOULD do. But they have to have their own salvation experience just like we did:

The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance.” 2Peter 3:9

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 11

Have you ever felt as if your kids, adult or not, seem to ‘scheme’? That’s because they are. They have pitted a war against their own parents, and I have to wonder if they really know what they are doing or why. Are they led by their own frustrations of being parented by Christians OR are they led by something more sinister? The kids will tell you it’s all the parents fault but the truth is even though they try to be a united front against us, they are fighting a real war against God with the devil himself:

And they said, “Come, let us build ourselves a city, and a tower whose top is in the heavens; let us make a name for ourselves, lest we be scattered abroad over the face of the whole earth.” Genesis 11:4

Have you noticed that adult kids demand restitution rather than being gently led with a patient hand? Maybe money talks, but not in my house. IF we had all the money in the world we would not buy their love and respect.

Money is usually the common denominator of their troubles; they don’t have it because they are living for themselves and against God…and somehow it’s our fault. To that I say this: If money were NOT the issue, then what is keeping you from being the loving son/daughter to us like you used to be? [Can you tell I used to be in sales?] So then, son/daughter, what IS that ‘one thing’ keeping you from being a family with us? Excuses, excuses.

Since the beginning of time, children took care of their ailing and elderly parents. It was a cohesive unit rather than prison. I would count it an honor to take care of my parents! Can you imagine giving back to them for what they gave? And if there were trouble, the ability and OPPORTUNITY to forgive and GIVE: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself‘, Mark 12:31.

There may be a war, but we have to deal with this one battle at a time; the battle today will be different than the battle tomorrow. Still they look upon us as the enemy even though we love them through everything they make us deal with. I don’t know about you, but our own enemies don’t treat us this badly.

Pray that adult children will return to their first love rather than chasing shadows.

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 10

Have they come to the end of themselves? Have our kids gotten to the point they HAVE to look to the Lord? I wish I knew the answer to that. I HATE that my adult kids have not learned that their way isn’t working. It’s like watching a train wreck in slow motion.

I see why God made parents the Pastor of the household, I understand the succession of authority and the learning curve. Your home isn’t just where you live, it’s also your church. But just because I see it plainly doesn’t mean they do or will or even care. As parents we are their support system that teaches them to support themselves financially AND spiritually….but are they listening? I promise you…they listen. That’s why they battle us.

All that being said, adult kids have misunderstood the hierarchy of family and take it upon themselves to disband…to ‘quit’ being our children and part of the family God created. It is a hardship, it is heartbreaking, it is NOT of God. But my dear parents, we can never lose hope!

These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

Are you the Pastor of your home? Are you like me, your kids have grown and left and still maintain a worldly lifestyle? In my house, my husband and I are still the Pastors of this home, of this family. We will not relinquish our Godly authority to anyone. It is our desire to teach our kids to pastor their own home.

Dear parents, PRAY and diligently seek Him no matter what! Our kids need us whether they say so or not.

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 9

Did you know that we are living IN biblical times? It’s interesting to me that so many Christians don’t think that everything in the Bible is for today, especially our kids. They look at us like we’ve lost our minds because we live by the literal Bible. Quite honestly, that tells me that Christians are trading in their Bible reading for the opinions of self-professed theologians; looking upon what men and women discern rather than God is dangerous. There are no ‘programs’ or upstarts, just chapter and verse. I knew a woman once that refused to read a ‘study’ Bible because she wanted to let the Holy Spirit teach her. I couldn’t agree more. Once we allow ‘fallible man’ in, we have put ourselves in jeopardy.

Our adult kids are following another Jesus: “v13 For such are false apostles, deceitful workers, transforming themselves into apostles of Christ. v14 And no wonder! For Satan himself transforms himself into an angel of light. v15 Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also transform themselves into ministers of righteousness, whose end will be according to their works”, [2Cor 11:13-15]

Our adult kids seem to be in the fire most of the time; well, at least ours seems to be. There never seems to be any rest. Our most precious time spent is trying to sleep. As a Christian, I KNOW that there will be rest that one day but I sure would like to see some of that rest on this side of Heaven. When are children are restless, so are we.

“v22 Therefore, because the king’s command was urgent, and the furnace exceedingly hot, the flame of the fire killed those men who took up Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-Nego. v23 And these three men, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-Nego, fell down bound into the midst of the burning fiery furnace.

v24 Then King Nebuchadnezzar was astonished; and he rose in haste and spoke, saying to his counselors, “Did we not cast three men bound into the midst of the fire?”

They answered and said to the king, “True, O king.”

v25 “Look!” he answered, “I see four men loose, walking in the midst of the fire; and they are not hurt, and the form of the fourth is like the Son of God.” Daniel 3:22-25

Even in the fiery furnace we have Jesus. The very next time you or your children are in the furnace, remember He is with you: “And the Lord, He is the One who goes before you. He will be with you, He will not leave you nor forsake you; do not fear nor be dismayed“, [Deut 31:8].

If it weren’t for Him, I really don’t know what I’d do. I just wish I could get my kids to understand that. Looking TO Jesus rather than looking BACK at the worries will strengthen the weakest and bring hope.

Pray for you adult kids; pray for their ‘rest’ rather than opportunities.

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: Day 8

Have we paid for what we have done in our sinful past? Is there a time when we won’t have to be ridiculed and criticized? When do we have to stop paying for the awful things we have done? The answer is: If your faith is in Christ alone, your eternity is in Heaven and your sin will never be remembered by anyone ever again. BUT while you are on this earth, you will suffer the responsibility and the repercussions of that act of sin, whatever it was.

No matter how saved I am, no matter how much I go to church, no matter how much I read my Bible and pray, I will always be known for who I WAS. This is the lesson we try to teach our children; they mess up, they will suffer the responsibility of it. Then the question is: Have you forgiven YOURSELF: “For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and their lawless deeds I will remember no more“, [Heb 8:12].

To understand mercy…to receive mercy, you have to GIVE mercy.

King David suffered the consequence of what he did with Bathsheba and Uriah, “v10 Now therefore, the sword shall never depart from your house, because you have despised Me“:

“v13 So David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the Lord.” And Nathan said to David, “The Lord also has put away your sin; you shall not die. v14 However, because by this deed you have given great occasion to the enemies of the Lord to blaspheme, the child also who is born to you shall surely die.” v15 Then Nathan departed to his house.” 2Samuel 12:13-15

When our kids are forlorn with the consequences of sin, we have to gird them up with prayer and love. Because we have been shown mercy in our times of trouble, we have to show them mercy. With mercy comes grace, with grace comes peace and freedom. I am not intimidated with pointed fingers anymore because I am a child of God, not the world. When our kids get their mind back – much like Nebuchadnezzar – they will be restored:

“v34 And at the end of the time I, Nebuchadnezzar, lifted my eyes to heaven, and my understanding returned to me; and I blessed the Most High and praised and honored Him who lives forever:

For His dominion is an everlasting dominion,
And His kingdom is from generation to generation.
v35 All the inhabitants of the earth are reputed as nothing;
He does according to His will in the army of heaven
And among the inhabitants of the earth.
No one can restrain His hand
Or say to Him, “What have You done?”

v36 At the same time my reason returned to me, and for the glory of my kingdom, my honor and splendor returned to me. My counselors and nobles resorted to me, I was restored to my kingdom, and excellent majesty was added to me. v37 Now I, Nebuchadnezzar, praise and extol and honor the King of heaven, all of whose works are truth, and His ways justice. And those who walk in pride He is able to put down.” Daniel 4:34-37

Pray for you children and grandchildren today, pray for understanding and restoration.

30 DAY PARENTING PRAYER CHALLENGE: DAY 7

My youngest and I took a ride in the car and I asked him, about five different ways, what are you going to do when you grow up? Crickets….but he did say that he will get a job. A job, I said…but school? College? A family someday? The long pause told me a resounding NO. He really has no plans at all. I can’t tell you how that hurts me as a his chosen mother.

I’ve been 16 before. I remember thinking that life is about to get ‘legal’ for me. Becoming 18 someday scared me to death because I lived in a house where the mindset was ‘getting by’ rather than planning a future. How I HATE seeing this has not changed even though I have begged all of my sons to think at least ONE step ahead rather than none.

While in prayer today, I remembered what God told the Prophet Jeremiah in the first chapter of his book; it spoke of how God CHOSE Jeremiah since before the very foundations of the world had shape:

“Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you; before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations.” Jeremiah 1:5

Each and every child – born, unborn, yet to be born – are known by God with a specific purpose and path chosen by Him. If every one of us just heeded that one line of scripture, I believe we would all stand taller and bolder and PROSPER in Him regardless of the past! We are not an afterthought regardless of HOW we were born. The potential of our children is IMMEASURABLE.

BUT: I can’t make that horse drink. My sons, like most of the people in the world, are scraping by holding out for a miracle. But lately I don’t see even that anymore. People are so forlorn and without hope.

Have we become a society totally without hope? Seeing through the eyes of my youngest son, YES; get a job, live, then die…..next!

WITHOUT God we cannot fathom how important we are and the path He chose for us is in His ultimate plan! We are His workmanship:

v13 For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother’s womb.
v14 I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well.
v15 My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
v16 Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.
And in Your book they all were written,
The days fashioned for me,
When as yet there were none of them.” Psalm 139

Pray today that your children, adult or not, understand their importance in His plan. God has never made an imperfect person, ever.